LOS LOCOS DE LAS 10 HORAS
*Sons of bitches*
*Sons of bitches-So-So-So-So-Sons of bitches*
Hey! I'm not the one who says that I'm the best spanish Youtuber.
The sound board says so, okay? Just explain it, 'cause then people be like:
Wismichu! You're full of yourself, you're a prepotent.
No! The sound board said so.
*Don't lie to your audience. Prepotent son of a bitch*
I'm going to end up disconnecting you like we did with grampa Paco. You've been warned!
*Hashtag:darkhumor, ha-ha-ha, so funny, dead grandpas jokes, ha-ha-ha-
[Disconnected] Fuck it!
No… I'm not gonna disconnect it, really… I can't disconnect her!
I depend on her! I no longer know how to make videos without her! Ya feel me? I love her! I need her! *Sons of bitches*
*Sons of bitches-Sons of bitched*
*Sons of bitches* *Sons of bitches*
Well, anyway, today I feel disappointed, ok? Very disappointed
because we have failed as a species. I was already aware of that, but after seeing what I've seen this week, you fuckin' bet I'm aware of that!
If Darwin gets to see what I've seen this week, he'd be spinning in his fucking grave.
And now, here they come, the typicall assholes…
'Darwin was not buried, he was cremated'
And what the fuck do I know? The fuck do I know? I make videos on my underwear.
Do you think I'm going to know if they buried him or cremated him?
Ch-ch-ch-ch, I swear!
There is always some one like this! Freaking…
*Sons of bitches* *Sons of bitches*
What the fuck do I know if Darwin was buried, cremated… Geez, let me see…
No, no, no!
I have to say it! Because lately…
at the first chance, they come with this nonsense, 'You said this, and it's actually that… hoi-hoi-hoi…'
Wikipedia: Darwin was buried.
He was buried, so my comment was correct, true. I swear… [Deadly-Strikes]
About a month and a half ago I made a challenge about a video of me dancing in underwear for 10 hours
dancing like a jackass, yeah…
If someone is able to do a 'live stream' watching this fucking 10 hour video…
I'll invite you for dinner. Really, my treat.
It turns out that there are people who have tried, and not only that, but that they have achieved it,
and no, I'm not going to pay the fucking dinner
if not, a fucking psychiatrist, and all the prescribed medication,
What's wrong with you? The hell is wrong with your mind?
*Sometimes, on rare occasions, I wonder…
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG! THIS FUCKING WORLD! YOU'RE ALL BAT-SHIT INSANEEEE!!!
Ok, ok, I'm done with the audio. I know I'm spamming with it…
Promise, I'll stop…
*Sons of Bitches* *Sons of Bitches*
*Sons of Bitches*
To tell you the truth, I didn't thought that anyone would actually do it, maybe try it, that's another story, we are 6 million people
in this channel, and within that 6 million people, there is always
a deranged person, with enough free time to try this…
but achieving it? Staying 10 hours straight
watching that crap… (Sigh)
On second thought, if you can watch shitty realities,
those shitty realities, everyday, hell, why not? Why not this crap?
The problem here is that there have been hundreds of people, some achieved it and others failed, but there has been too many…
hundreds of demented, one of them fell asleep… Watch this!
I am a man of my word, so I'll pay for dinner. But you also have to be a man of his word. I said that you had to watch the full 10 hours…
Therefore, if you fall asleep, sleepy head, then you did not watch the full video… You don't get the free meal…
The same goes for all those poor bastards who said: Wismichu! I really did it…
and while the 'live stream' was on, they were: hihi, haha! on Twitter. That is not watching the video, eh?
But really, some people really done it.
Some did it; I must congratulate those who really managed to watch the 10 hours without taking their eyes off the screen, not even for a moment!
Also, there was a kid who tried it twice. The first one: 5 hours, couldn't do it.
I'm sorry, but I cannot keep the pace…
I'm playing LOL with my buddies.
He returned and said: Fuck it! My 'cohones' are on the line!
I'm doing it again! I'll do it! He did another stream, of 12 hours…
This one's twice as a wanker!
First try is for idiots. Second try is for fucking idiots.
He's even more of an asshole.
I'll even go further…
If you really decide to come…
I'll put you away from us.
One table for the winners and me, ok?
And another table for you, separated from us.
Just security measures, security measures. We don't know what you're capable of…
A couple of metres, just in case…
Nowadays, you never know…
And you've proved that you lack mental health.
Fuck me! When did the Spanish education system failed so hard…
Why did it failed so hard?
Look, I'm gonna sit down, I'm gonna sit down because
I want to comment some moments of the best 'live streams'
and I need to be sit down, to digest this hogwash,
just in case I faint, or somethin like that, let's go
Some dude that did it, got supplies, and not only that
he brought a bucket, a bucket!
A fucking bucket to shit inside!
Just in case 'nature called' Let's go, I have…
a water bottle here,
tempered water here,
an lil' apple, just in case, dunno…
just in case a bucket, y'know
I'm prepared, and if it stinks…
I also have this thing, I'm prepared
It's only 10 hours
I want to comprehend you, I want to respect you
I want to do this video, I'm thrilled by it
but I'm having a hard time, really, because it's 10 fucking hours
and that is easy to say, but it's not like that…
You've lost 10 hours of your life, and when you get to 90 years old,
in your deathbed,
about to pass away
you wont remember your friends nor your family
you'll remember me! The son of a bitch, that made you lose
10 hours when you were young, and oh boy! How nice would it be for you to have those 10 hours back
How nice would it be! Gee whiz!
Ah, no? Goog god! I'm telling you right now that yes!
I'm done with it, promise, I'll stop… I'll stop…
Worst thing is, this brat starts his 'live stream', and he takes his sweet time
talking without any audio. People be like:
'We can't hear you! Ugh…'
And he had to restart it.
But the best part was his face. His face in the right moment when he notices it…
When he notices that there is no audio. Like in that episode in 'The Simpsons'
When Bart repeats the clip all the time
when Lisa breaks the heart of Ralph
Just like that, you know, look at his face. You can see exactly
the moment when his heart breaks
Look at this Lisa!
I can pin the exact frame when you crushed his heart!
Well, this is one of the ones that managed to finish the challenge, but wait
lokk how he ends the 'live stream'. Thanks to be with me 10 hours
I'm still hearing the damn music…
with all and that…
Just before leaving, there is something that I must do…
Dislike. First video that I dislike.
Child endangerment. (Child abuse) The hell!
The hell are you doing? That video which you just saw
is art! Is art in it's fullest form!
Don't look down on it!
Don't dislike it, and don't report it! Look! Bring the bucket!
Bring the bucket for the dinner! You're gonna need it!
I'll personally make sure that laxatives join every single of your meal dishes
Then we have this fella, that for every 30 minutes
he danced for about 5.
What'cha gonna do about it? Yep… People are not sane…
People are not sane, ok? Catalonia wants an independence from Spain,
As for me, I want to become independent from humanity.
It's easy, simple… Shall we vote?
Votes in favor?
Eh, eh… no, no, no!
Hold it, hold it!
In fact, in this last one, if my memory serves me right
there is an instance, when the mother enters the room, and instead of punishing him,
or telling him: What the shit are you doing?, she starts to dance as well. The one you're about to witness
is one of the losers, in fact, it barely lasts for 10 minutes
but it makes me laugh, because he shows the video to his mother,
and she really believed that I danced for 10 hours
spinning like a maniac. 'And 10 hours like this?'
'Can you last?'
'Are you taking the piss?'
'Did he really do that for 10 hours?' No.
'Ah… now it makes sense. That would be impressive.'
'Because if he really did that, I'd have to give him credit.'
Let's see, madame, do you really believe that if I really did that
for 10 hours straight, I would have this right here?
Eh? Would I have this, right here? Most of you may have noticed
but the dude is super nervous, while filming with his mother.
I really don't get it, I mean, it's your mother, why are you nervous while filming with her?
The fuck is wrong with you, dude? The best thing of the video is that around minute 8, approximately,
the mother compares me with Dalí. Y'see?
I make art, ART! 'Hey, everone has it's own way of…'
'…manifesting' Oh come on, please… 'Art can be…'
'of any colour and shape.'
Was that art? 'But of course!'
That is the frog jump, come on… 'Art…'
'No, gentleman, no.'
'Art can be… look,'
'when Dalí debuted, you could see coloured brushstrokes'
'here and there, disfigured faces, and out of nowhere'
'a leg, and another over there, an arm…'
'so what? He was a genius'
'of painting discipline. So maybe this type of…'
'Youtube, the youtubers…' We call anything art
This madame is a scholar,
this woman can recognise what's really art when she sees it.
So, because of that, right? Despite not finishing the 10 hours challenge,
I'll invite her. Madame? You and me. A nice dinner.
Whenever and wherever you fancy, is that alright? (Flying kiss)
Another channel that made it, is one
specialized in doing this kind of challenges.
And when I say this kind of challenges, I also say
wasting your time in the most absurd way possible.
In his channel, this kid has videos about, for example, counting
from 1 to 100.000 in a single video.
'44.078… 44.079…' ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Watching a cat playing the piano for 10 hours.
Reading all the words from a dictionary
in one video. 'Flujo… Flúor'
'Fluidos…' Spinning a spinner
for 4 hours straight.
How many times do you have to lick a lollipop to get to the core?
'500' 'Uf, almost…'
*But what is this, WHAT IS THIS?*
But, if there is something that I want to highlight, and that I found absolutely brilliant
about these 'live streams', is to witness how their life energy
get lesser by the minute. How their flames
of vitality get consumed.
In those cringeworthy silences, when they realize
that they're wasting their lives for a stupid challenge,
and at the same time, existential questions
appear in their minds.
(Spanish joke, similar to the english joke: Buildings are built, so why are they called buildings?)
Why do we wash our towels? Aren't we supposed to be clean when using them?
If an attorney goes crazy, did he lost his judgement?
Why all together is written separated and separated is written all together?
Why is Pluto an orange dog?
No, seriously, I was recording the audios and it hit me…
like… why an orange dog?
I mean, the Disney staff lost their marbles, holy shit…
As I've said, I'm a man of my word, alright? I'll contact
the people that completed the challenge, rightfully,
and I'll invite them to dinner.
Hey! Only to have a dinner, like having 'bravas', 'pinchos',
and little more, we can't have here…
a freaking banquet, it's what it is. Youtube is monetizing like ass.
(Whispers) I had to exploit this moment to complin, sorry. And remember, I said dinner,
only dinner. I'm just saying, because more than one participated
in Argentina, Mexico and so on…
and he's gonna think: 'Oh my god, he's goin to pay me a flying ticket to Spain'
Yeah… Sure… Suuuure…. (**Sarcasm)
You're an optimistic one… One last thing before departing…
*Sons of bitches**Sons of bitches**Sons of bitches* *So-so-so-so-so…
*So-so-so-ons-s-s-of-of-bitch* x 10000 (Malfunctioning)
^And tell me whyyyyyyy, should've let you go, go, go, go. Because I love you so, so, so, so.
^That's why I'm here toniiiight, so put your hand up…!